24 July: Tell an Old Joke Day

On Tell an Old Joke Day, 10 corny old jokes:

1. When Is A Door Not A Door? When it’s ajar.
2. Who Is The Greatest Chicken-Killer In Shakespeare? Macbeth, because he did murder most fowl.
3. My wife's gone to the West Indies. Jamaica? No she went of her own accord.
4. "My Dog's nose has fallen off." "How does he smell?" "Terrible."
5. What did Big Ben say to the Leaning Tower of Pisa? I've got the time if you've got the inclination!
6. What goes 99 bonk, 99 bonk? A centipede with a wooden leg.
7. What lies at the bottom of the sea and shakes? A nervous wreck.
8. Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains! Oh, pull yourself together!
9. Waiter, there's a fly in my soup. Don't shout so loud, sir, everybody will want one.
10. A lady decided to take a Milk bath. She phoned the dairy and asked for a delivery of their best milk. "Pasteurized?" "No, up to my neck will be fine."

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Killing Me Softly

Sebastian Garrett is an assassin. It wasn’t his first choice of vocation, but nonetheless, he’s good at it, and can be relied upon to get the job done. He’s on top of his game.

Until he is contracted to kill Princess Helena of Galorvia. She is not just any princess. Sebastian doesn’t bargain on his intended victim being a super-heroine who gives as good as she gets. Only his own genetic variant power saves him from becoming the victim, instead of Helena. 

Fate has another surprise in store. Sebastian was not expecting to fall in love with her.

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