Wednesday 8 June 2016

8th June: Joan Rivers

Today is the birthday of Joan Rivers, US comedian, actress, talk show host and businesswoman. She was born in 1933.



  1. People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.
  2. The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it.
  3. I've had so much plastic surgery, when I die they will donate my body to Tupperware.
  4. Don't follow any advice, no matter how good, until you feel as deeply in your spirit as you think in your mind that the counsel is wise.
  5. Life goes by fast. Enjoy it. Calm down. It's all funny.
  6. I don't exercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor.
  7. She doesn't understand the concept of Roman numerals. She thought we just fought in world war eleven.
  8. It's been so long since I made love I can't even remember who gets tied up.
  9. Ginger did everything Fred did, only backwards and in High Heels!
  10. Humour doesn't come out of the good times, it comes out of the anger, pain and sorrow.

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