Wednesday 14 January 2015

January 14: Take a Missionary to Lunch Day

Today is Take a Missionary to Lunch Day, which celebrates the birthday of Albert Schweitzer, a Nobel prize-winning missionary to Africa. Call me twisted, but my first thought on reading the name of this observance was, I bet the cannibals look forward to this one! So thought I'd share 10 cannibal jokes.


  1. Two cannibals talking after dinner: Your wife makes a perfect pot roast. Yes, but I’ll miss her.
  2. What should you do for a starving cannibal? Give him a hand.
  3. What does a cannibal who is late for dinner get? The cold shoulder.
  4. What did the cannibal say when he saw the missionary asleep? Aha! Breakfast in bed.
  5. Just because there are cannibals here there is no need to get into a stew.
  6. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other, “Does this taste funny to you?”
  7. I'm a cannibal. And frankly I'm fed up with people.
  8. 1st cannibal: Are you enjoying your meal? 2nd cannibal: Yes, I’m having a ball.
  9. New style Russian roulette: a man goes to bed with six women. One of them is a cannibal.
  10. What does Hannibal Lecter call someone who is in a really good mood? A happy meal.

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