Friday, 7 July 2017

17 July: Phyllis Diller

US Comedienne Phyllis Diller was born 100 years go today. Here are ten of her witty comments. 


  1. A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.
  2. Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?
  3. Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
  4. Aim high, and you won't shoot your foot off.
  5. We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.
  6. What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.
  7. His finest hour lasted a minute and a half.
  8. I spent seven hours in a beauty shop... and that was for the estimate.
  9. It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge.
  10. Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.

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